I can't help falling down stairs headfirst

Doctors’ bills
Fill my mailbox
For I can’t help
Falling down stairs headfirst.

Stand aside
I’m a ton of rocks,
For I can’t help
Falling down stairs headfirst.

Like a dumbbell swoons
Tugged by gravity,
As in Looney Tunes
Mishaps were meant to be.
Take my pulse,
’Cause I fear the worst,
For I can’t help
Falling down stairs headfirst.

Like a dumbbell swoons
Tugged by gravity,
As in Looney Tunes
Mishaps were meant to be.
Take my pulse,
Cause I fear the worst,
For I can’t help
Falling down stairs headfirst
Yes, I can’t help
Falling down stairs headfirst.